


The Emperor's Smiles

by brawltogethernow



Category: Code Geass
Genre: Accountability as Defined by Suzaku Kururugi, Cahoooooooots, Character Study, Epic Friendship, Gen, Lelouch's Compulsive Subterfuge, Suzaku's Guilt Complex, set right at the end there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-27
Updated: 2018-02-27
Packaged: 2019-03-24 16:39:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13815210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brawltogethernow/pseuds/brawltogethernow
Summary: Between them working together again and Lelouch putting aside the Zero mask, Suzaku is in a better position to analyze his friend's face than he's been in a while.





	The Emperor's Smiles

**Author's Note:**

> You don't want to know how long this has been in my files.

Between them working together again and Lelouch setting aside the Zero mask, Suzaku has had more opportunity to study his friend's face than he has in a long time.

Lelouch has a lot of smiles, but his _real_ smiles have always been a little bit crazy. If they don't look at least a little unhinged, deranged, or dangerous, you know he's faking, and probably playing you in some way. Not necessarily in a _large_ way. But at the very least toward the goal of some minor, less harmful scheme, like to convince people he's a more ordinary variety of likable, or to keep someone precious to him from worrying. Lelouch views these as small courtesies that are not worth dwelling on.

Suzaku disagrees. It isn't that he condemns the practice of the fake smile entirely: He just thinks that each small lie should be entered into with consideration. And at least a _little_ guilt. You should acknowledge where papering small lies over everything is going to get you.

Suzaku has always valued honesty, though he's never been good at it. He only looks good at it if he’s standing within a few feet of Lelouch.

Lelouch's smug smirks are also public smiles. If he doesn't care about _you_ , personally, he cares about your opinion, on some level. Everything is part of the game to Lelouch. Suzaku doesn't know how he does it, or when he made it necessary. Maybe the habit started in his childhood in the viper pits that are the Britannian royal palaces. Euphemia and Nunnaly never fell into that, but Nunnaly they've always tried to shelter, and Euphemia was just. Better. Maybe Lelouch would have ended up like this whichever way. He'll never know.

And Suzaku suspects Lelouch _can't_ , actually, handle it.

If Lelouch smiles any of those smiles in private, he's lying to himself. Suzaku’s not in a position to throw stones there.

 

It's strangely insulated, running a con to trick the entire world. It's also hectic and frantic, both of them barreling toward what they each want least, their twin atonements.

But it's nice being on Lelouch's side again. Their engagements in stilted facsimiles of companionship stretch back so far that it almost feels like they're working together for the first time. They haven’t since they were children. Maybe some people wouldn't even count that, but Suzaku believes age doesn't discount your actions. And he’s never doubted his early bond with Lelouch was real, not really. It was a solid constant, even when the situation it formed in started to seem implausible, unreal and ephemeral as a fairy tale.

The only thing that disconnects the start of their friendship from their machinations now is scale. This, their grand endeavor, is the sort of thing they had always assumed they would eventually be able to achieve, the level they assumed they would play on.

Though Suzaku has always had the impression that most people were eventually disabused of those assumptions.

 

They both had to change to make it work, being allies again. Suzaku is pretty sure he had to change _more_ , but, well, that was true the first time, too. If his entire existence has been an erosion of the self, Lelouch, at least, makes him _better_ for it.

(Euphie didn’t take anything of him, but she.)

(...)

 

 When Lelouch declared he was going to destroy Britannia – when he began recruiting for his cause with two children alone in a new wasteland – he looked determined.

Determination isn’t a good look on Lelouch. It’s no wonder that he cultivated such an uncaring air as Zero, since with him being visibly invested goes hand in hand with seeming visibly insane. Though it wasn’t as bad back then. There was hatred, and none of the unquestionable trustworthiness Lelouch would cultivate for strategic deployment later, but also none of the relish at the thought of being able to _act_ on his hate that would become a dark sickness in Suzaku’s truest friend as his determination festered over the passing years, rotting him from within.

Suzaku knows all about pure intentions leading to things that are darker.

But Nunnaly couldn't see him (didn't seen her brother for years), and Suzaku, well. Suzaku never thought he would help Lelouch in this, but here he is, and all his regrets are old ones.

There are usually spectators these days, but when they're gone Lelouch smiles at him. And his eyes betray a dangerous wanting, like he can see how to burn the world exactly as he likes it.

It's reassuring. It's how Suzaku can tell there are no more lies between them.


End file.
